Some of the Ways Social Service Programs (and other helping systems
)
Revictimize Battered Women
We don't believe her.
We don't recognize her strengths.
We fail to realize her manipulative tendencies are survival skills.
We question why she has stayed in the relationship or returns
to it.
We question her inconsistency and react to her not following through
with goals, etc....
We fault her parenting.
We "evaluate" her.
We only like "good victims" and enlightened victims.
We hold cultural biases: we are sexist, racist, and homophobic.
We take control.
We uphold unrealistic expectations.
We patronize her.
We don't allow her much or any privacy.
We question her need for shelter protection when she makes contact
with her partner.
We buy into such labeling as: co-dependency, enabler, addicted
to love, etc...."the women as defective" theory.
We blame her for failing to protect her children.
We assume that leaving an abusive partner will set her free without
recognizing the social abuse and stigma that low income, single
women, and women-headed families face.
We fail to recognize her religious beliefs about marriage and
family.
We fail to validate and/or understand her positive, even loving
feelings towards her partner.
We fail to advise her about realistic outcomes of counseling for
her partner.
We fail to create bridges in the community.
-Author Unknown
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